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My life is messy

Journal Entry: Fri Mar 21, 2014, 1:40 AM
Volume XVI

So... videogames.

I think my whole last year was a complete rollercoaster ride. I don't think I've worked so hard in my life. 
The games I worked on were incredibly different and jumping between polar opposite visual styles. Was like doing 
paint-yoga for 12 months non-stop. 

So where am I now after it's all shipped and on sale?
Feeling very proud because Resogun really is fantastic
and when playing it I can feel all the love we put into it's game design and 

Also I'm dead tired... and kind of lost. 

 I spent so much time focused on achieving the goals I set for myself at work that now that I achieved
them there's suddenly this big void of nothing. I think I work pretty well under pressure but when I'm not
"driven" by a goal that I feel passionate about like that I unravel like toilet paper in the wind.

Yes the obvious thing is to focus on next games. However I feel like I  kind of need more substance in my life.
I just have no idea what that might be so my plan is to:

A) give myself a bit time off to just be for once, maybe even reconnect with people I haven't seen in ages
B) explore things I could do with my art.

I feel like doing a small visual project would be fun at this point. When creating a whole world for a game 
you can feel a bit hollow afterwards because it's probably 2 to 3 years of your life that you've spent in a completely
fictional space. Doing something smaller right now would probably feel like less risky for my soul.  
It needs to mend before it can give again. =)

  • Listening to: back to black
  • Watching: the clouds go by
  • Playing: Resogun
  • Eating: On a damn diet for the 3rd month in a row.
  • Drinking: lol, I wish! See above.
Add a Comment:
Ezolir Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
-Sigh- i honestly don't know how to say what i think of the art you have here. The closest word is beautiful, but even that falls short of the wonder i feel. you are amazing, but that's not the main thing I wanted to tell you. What I really want to say is Nothing new. just merely a little word of advice; life is... complicated, but that's old news by now. life is an art all its own, being so much more than the sum of its parts. the shapes of the events, the colors of the feeling that accompany them, and the medium you use to create them: it is the whole composition and the way these things combine to form you that is the true masterpiece. 

i hope i didn't over step any boundaries, especially since i am just a random passerby, i will be watching for more art from you. good luck in life and all that you do. please take care, there are a lot of us who admire people with your talent.

wolfnoom Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2014   Digital Artist
beatifull entry :)
i can tottally understand you, good luck with that man, hope you find your muse in this big world.
angrymikko Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you for those kind words. 

It's kinda strange how I feel like I just wrote that journal and have been emotionally flatlining ever since. 
I hope the artists reading this will take note to take care of themselves. Muses can be needy and will not be understanding if you need to rest. 
wolfnoom Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2014   Digital Artist
yeah, it just devours ppl lifes. dave rapoza wrote something of what he had been doing in the last 2 years in his blog, a few days ago, talk about balanced lifes, large entry but really cool reading. 
ilinga Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It's so awesome for me to see the game and know, that I "know" one of the artists behind these pictures, other (overwhelming beautiful!) works and to see your progress.
And I think we all know this kind of feeling, when you have to slip back into reality, after been caught in a fictional world...
Just breathe, relax and do what's feeling right. ♥
I'm looking forward to your little project. :)
SineSquared Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
I love that feeling of it all being worth it at the end!  Enjoy it!!  The video for the game looks fantastic.  I hope you get some free time to sort out your messy life!
AngryPotato Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
oh goodness, i am in the middle of that right now and i am a zombie.....go get a billion massages and eat all the food and sleep forever...thats what i plan to do haha
pika Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Do A and B together. ^-^v Nice and easy!
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Submitted on
March 21, 2014


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